Onwards and Upwards

So since Thursday, lots has changed. Mostly my mood. I seem to have shed my bubble of graduate sadness and now I'm feeling so much more positive.

Saturday I woke up in an awful mood, it was raining and I had a job trial. I got ready and trudged off in the rain to "work". I got there and hated it. I was just thinking this is so not me. At all. But I got on with it and met some of the staff who seemed nice. Including an old face from the past, I don't think they recognised me but it reminded me of being an 18 year old and all the stupid things I used to do back then. Bad times. Despite spending 2 hours serving old drunk men and chavs, I left thinking it wasn't all bad.

Saturday night I went to a party with both of my brothers. I wasn't so bothered about going, but they both told me I had to and that big bro's friends didn't believe I existed because they had never met me.. So off I went. I was that awkward person who hardly knew anyone. My way to solve that? Drink a bottle of wine in an hour. Drunkenly loosened up and started chatting to people. I spoke to this guy who mentioned he ran a charity, when I said I was interested in doing something communications/PR related he jumped on it and asked if I'd go in and do some voluntary work with him. He even said I could give myself any title I want to put on my CV... perfect! I had a really good night. Despite the over protective brothers warning me off every guy I spoke to. I ended the night drinking rum, vodka and coke with some guy I'd never met before and passed out in the living room about 7am. Probably the worst way to move on from someone, but having a flirt and stuff with a new guy definitely set me on the road to not caring about the last guy. After 2 hours sleep I tip toed out of the house and wandered home. Definitely didn't want my brothers friends seeing me at 9am leaving a room I'd shared with another friend and get the wrong idea... So far, nothing has been mentioned so all is good!

After a quick nap I went to see my friend and we chatted, bitched and moaned our way through a hangover lunch and I left feeling pretty happy but also like a zombie. I do not cope well without enough sleep.

Monday I got a call from the job trial, offering me work. Finally I have a job, even if it's not really where I want to be. It could be worse and at least it means I'm going to have some money coming in and something to do with all my free time! I really need to call the charity guy as well, but I have this slight secret fear of talking on the phone. Also a fear of commitment, scared of getting involved in something and being a bit stuck. Stupid, I know, I need the experience but it scares me. I'll call him tomorrow... which may have been what I said yesterday too...

So, in general, life is good. FINALLY. I know it was never really bad and that a bar job is hardly making life perfect but you know when you just wake up in a much better frame of mind? That was me yesterday. I actually sang along to some songs, cooked dinner for the family, walked the dog, all things I would have found really hard last week.

I have a few things coming up to look forward to, birthdays, nights out, that kind of thing. I think I'm also about to do something naughty and take out a new phone contract. Is £31 a month excessive? I don't know. I pay £21 now but I want an iPhone sooo...

Onwards and upwards.